Why?
by Simallyher
Summary: Rose has questions the Doctor doesn’t have the answers. Rose10th. Extended summary inside
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Why?**

**Pairings: Rose/10th**

**Summary: Rose has questions; the Doctor doesn't have the answers. What happens when things go from warm to cold? Can the Doctor and Rose figure things out, or have they already been chosen for them?  
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Disclaimer: I don't own Dr Who, it's scripts, casts or crew.**

Rose 

__

'Some things are worth getting your broken for' Sarah Jane Smith's words rang true in Rose at that moment, watching the Doctor break apart because of Madame De Pompadour. Not even Mickey could distract her enough for it to stop breaking, he had pulled her away, let the Doctor have some time but this wasn't the way things were supposed to go. He wasn't supposed to be there, Mickey that is, he was supposed to be having a life back in England. Rose and the Doctor sorted things out there and then, out in the open straight away; keeps the baggage to a minimum then.

"Doctor" Rose asked softly sitting at the kitchen table, "Why her?"

"Why her what?" the Doctor asked.

"Why her? Why her brain, her heart, her…love" Rose whispered the last word.

"I don't know why Rose, she had a fairly advanced brain for a human, but her heart was average if you ask me; she just worked too hard" he replied.

"And her love?"

"There isn't an answer you want to hear Rose, so why ask the question?" the Doctor looked at her.

"I don't know really, just sort of came out" Rose stirred her tea.

"I want to tell you it meant nothing, but she saw me Rose, she understood me and she remembered it" the Doctor smiled slightly.

"Who else has understood you?" Rose asked curious.

"For a brief moment…you. You saw everything, felt everything I felt, understood everything. As soon as I took the vortex out of you, it suppressed the memory; otherwise you would have died" the Doctor replied.

"Preferred me to die than you" Rose sniffed, "Oh what is that smell?"

"Don't change the…my God it's alive!" the Doctor gagged

"Where is it coming from?"

"How should I know, I've been with you" the Doctor stared at her with disbelief

"DOCTOR! ROSE!" Mickey called, running to the kitchen

"Mickey the Idiot" the Doctor growled, "What have you done?"

"I went into a room, and it just started spraying…it won't stop!" Mickey puffed

Rose burst out laughing, "You went into the room with the red door didn't you?"

"Yea why? Somethin' wrong with it?"

"Only that it hates new people" Rose burst, still laughing, "I was snagged in it last year!" Rose faced the Doctor, "You remember last year just after I came along?"

"Oh that's right, you were smelling foul for days!" the Doctor grinned

** Doctor **

She wants answers but they aren't the ones that would make her happy, maybe she doesn't want to be made happy. Rose would have to be the most unbelievably complex human I've met. Somehow though, she makes me laugh, just when I thought my mouth couldn't even form a grin, I'm laughing. It does help that Mickey the Idiot just stepped into the red room!

"You ok?" Rose asked me, Mickey had left obviously to go wash

"I will be" I smile for her

"Don't lie to me Doctor, she may have been into your head, but I've spent the past year and a bit with you and you are just as bad a liar than you were in your last body" Rose smiled at him, she did know him.

"How do you do that?"

"What?"

"That…" he gestured nothing in particular, words were at a loss for him.

"What read you like a book?" Rose grinned

"Yes, that" she can even understand my wild gestures…interesting.

"She may have been able to look into your mind, tell you how lonely you were. But it doesn't mean that she knows you better than me. Yes Doctor, she may have been able to see things within your mind I won't ever see…but I know you. I know your routine, your habits; I have history with you that she would never have. Not because she died either, but because the history we have is exclusive to us, you just have a kiss, a touch and a dance. All the things we can never have, so you fell for her" Rose finished, wow, she still amazes me.

"How can you be so immature one minute, sulky the next and then completely understanding and beautiful the next?" the Doctor looked at her, there has to be something feeding her this. Or she's just grown up.

"Firstly, everyone reserves the right to immature every now and then, granted I am more than sometimes. However, you are too uptight so one of us has to have fun. Secondly, I'm a female, we sulk, and men drink beer. Thirdly, I understand most of what you tell me, the important stuff at least. Fourthly, I thought I'd be beautiful all the time, but you obviously only see beauty when I'm performing at Madame's level" Rose huffed, "Just so you know, this is me being sulky"

The Doctor watched Rose storm out, how is it possible for things between them go from warm to cold in seconds. It's almost as if they are drowning in something and they reach the surface only after the waves are gone. He sat and stared at her still half full cup of tea, steam was still rising from it. "Humans"

The Doctor left his cup of tea on the counter as well, following the direction he knew she would take. Reaching her room the door was ajar, he stopped. Her sobs broke through the crack, "What have I done now?" he went to open the door only to stop again.

"I'm not sure what to do anymore" It was Rose, she was talking to someone, but there was no one around, "He left without even realising I would be stuck. I know you would've taken me home, this, you are my home now. Yea, he'd probably laugh at me, calling me crazy to hear me talking to you, the TARDIS. He just doesn't get it does he? It's not that he left without thinking to go save her; it's that he left without saying goodbye. I stood there for five and a half hours waiting, all because the stupid sod hadn't said goodbye, how stupid am I? I guess you'd have to be stupid to be in-love with a Time Lord, you would know though wouldn't you? You've been with him for the whole 900 years haven't you? The only one to get close to him, at least enough to get some affection back…yea I see how he strokes you"

Time to step in, "Rose? Are you in there?"

"No"

"Rose"

"I'm not…"

"Look Rose, I think we need to talk" the Doctor walked in, "Before you go off at me, my eyes are shut so get dressed if need be"

"Wouldn't matter, I'm not being smart…not beautiful anyway"

"Oh come on Rose, I didn't mean it like that and you know it!" he snapped opened his eyes, "You have always been beautiful"

"That's not what you said a few minutes ago" Rose was being stubborn, something they had in common.

"What I said a few minutes ago came out wrong" the Doctor answer through gritted teeth before sighing, "You would have to be the most complex human I've met!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Rose snapped

"You…you are everywhere! You feel everything, you are defenceless and yet you will stand in front of the Emperor of the Daleks and tell him even he can die. You have the uncanny ability to read into everything I say or gesture…how do you know what I'm saying when I do this?" the Doctor began to gesture wildly

"Hey! That is not something you should be saying about my mum" Rose snapped, she was doing that a lot today

"How do you do that?"

"I don't do anything"

"Then how do you know what I was saying?"

"How should I know, I just seem to hear it" Rose sighed, "I hear a lot of things"

She hears things? "Like what exactly?"

"I don't know, the TARDIS, you're gestures…is it the TARDIS translating them?" Rose jumped

"No, otherwise my other companions would be able to know what I was saying" the Doctor was puzzled

"Don't know then, maybe I just know you well enough" Rose grinned, and we're back to warm and fuzzy…little less fuzz.

"Hmm…but as I was saying you are the most complex human I've encountered, including Madame de Pompadour" the Doctor grinned, "You have done something no one has ever lived to tell…you took in the Time Vortex and you saved me" Rose's grin faded.

"I killed you"

"No, no…well yes that body, but I'm still here" the Doctor jumped up, "Look, still me, just a new body…why do I feel we've had this conversation before? Anyway, you saved me Rose, something I don't think even Madame de Pompadour could have done"

"Stop trying to make me feel better" Rose whispered, "It won't change what happened"

"No it won't, but I'm sorry Rose" he lifted her chin, "I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye, without giving a reason, without thinking" She looks so sad, "I can't change what happened"

"Then tell me why her?"

And we are back to the beginning, "Like I said there isn't an answer you want to hear"

"Let me decide that, now tell me"

**A/N: My first Dr Who fic, please be nice…**

Fyre-Anjel


	2. Chapter 2

**Rose**

He was about to avoid the topic again, I know he is. There's the tell tale sign of him about to talk about something other than what I asked.

"You can hear the TARDIS?" he asked, yep just as predicted.

"Stop it ok, you're not getting out of this, now tell me, why her?"

"Do we really have to do this now? Mickey is asleep a few doors away and I don't want you yelling and waking him up! It's hard enough to find excuses to get him to leave us alone…oh crap I wasn't going to say that" I couldn't help but laugh at him, "What?"

"You're finding reasons to get rid of Mickey and he's only been with us what…three days?" I kept laughing until I realised what he'd done. "Oh no you don't, I'm on to you Doctor, stop changing the subject"

"See, that just annoys me. Can't even do a simple subject change without you picking up on it anymore, I remember a time when I could talk my way out of any situation, and believe me I have! I remember this one time…"

"I remember it too, very clearly, like it was moments ago" I grinned at him, "Why can't you just tell me?"

"Because you'll leave Rose, they all do. They don't want to spend the rest of their lives couped up in a police box travelling thousands of years away from everything they know and love" the Doctor burst.

"What makes you think I'm going to do what they do?" I ask, finally he's talking to me.

"Because Rose, you're just like them, you love the travelling and the action and then you'll get tired and bored. You'll long for the luxuries of being in one place, for having something stable with someone who will grow old with you and who will die in your life time" he looks so sad and lonely. "I don't want to have to think of you leaving Rose, but I'm not stupid, I know you will leave eventually, maybe when Mickey leaves or maybe after, but you will leave and I will be alone again"

"I can't promise I'll stay" I began, knowing those five words will break his heart, "but I will promise that I'll stay until you make me leave. Whether I get too slow for you, or I get sick, even if I die" I smile at him, hoping he understands.

**Doctor**

She just doesn't understand, I don't want to make her leave, I don't want to tell her why Reinette and not her. I know I will though, I know to keep her I will have to tell her, and maybe forcing her to leave wouldn't be such a bad option. I've done it before.

"Then maybe I should make you leave now, before you end up hurt, damaged, sick or dead" I reply flatly, I can't show emotion, not now.

"So this is what it comes down to? I give you and out and you take it?" she laughs at me, but I can see the pain and tears swelling. "Well alright, set course for Powell Estate then Doctor, I'm going home" she turns from me, I know why; it's her ending the conversation.

"What do you want me to do Rose?"

"Tell me the truth maybe? Tell me why you're sending me home, why Reinette, why you let Mickey onboard when you obviously don't like him…take your pick Doctor time is ticking away" she's spiteful now, next will come anger.

"I'm sending you home because it'll hurt too much to see you die!" I'm letting this loose before she gets her anger in, at which point I know nothing I say will reach beyond the out layer of her ears. "I let Reinette kiss me and dance with me because it was a breath of fresh air Rose! I let Mickey onboard because I knew he would do a great job of distracting you, because then if you were distracted I might actually be able to breath!" I should stop, but I can't. "I can't breathe when you're around Rose, you fog everything up, and you make everything so bloody complicated!"

"Hey! She doesn't deserve to be spoken to like that!" Mickey broke through my words.

I spun on him faster than a speeding bullet, "And you Mickey Smith, I don't need another Smith onboard! I thought having you around would help me but you don't, you only make everything worse, because now instead of distracting Rose, you're distracting me! All I can think about it you holding her and kissing her do you realise how much I despise the fact that you can do that?"

Mickey just started at me, but then again so would I…what am I saying. No, no, no! This is not supposed to be spilling out; I'm supposed to be making her leave!

"Doctor?"

"Yes Rose" I sigh looking at her.

"Are you alright?"

"No, no I'm not" I slump against her bed, I can almost hear the objection coming from Mickey, "Go away Mickey, this doesn't involve you"

"When it involves…"

"My TARDIS now get out!" I snap, and he closes the door. Rose looks across at me; I know I've said too much. "Look I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap like that, it's just he is so stupid"

"Am I really that much of an annoyance?" her words are so hesitant.

"In some ways yes, you know what I mean all the time, you can judge my every move, and I heard you talking to the TARDIS earlier. Sorry didn't mean to. I feel restricted and I know that sounds like a bad thing but it's not. I don't want you to leave Rose, honestly, I just thought that if you left I could go back to the way I was, but then I began thinking…which was right about the time I started blurting out everything…that if I forced you to leave me I'd regret it every day until my regenerations run out. I didn't do Reinette out of spite or to be hurtful Rose, I meant what I said, she was fresh air" I tried explaining myself but I don't think I did it well enough, the pain and tears returned to her eyes.

"So what you're saying is I'm not fresh air?"

"Yes, but I never said fresh air was a good thing" I tried justifying myself, which I knew would get me in even more trouble.

"Fresh air can only mean good Doctor" there goes the first tear.

"No it can't, everything has more than one meaning! Like rose now has two meanings for me" Easy just get it over and done with…

"Yea? What are they?" she whispers

"Well of course there is the flower meaning, where the rose is delicate and beautiful. Then there is the other meaning, where the rose is still delicate and beautiful but the rose is also strong, unwavering and powerful. This rose has a pull on everything surrounding it; everything is drawn towards it as it moves across time and space"

"The second rose doesn't pull everything to it" Rose replied flatly.

"Oh yes it does, with a force so strong nothing can withstand it. Even the strongest must bow and accept defeat" I look up at her; she must know what I'm saying. This is the closest I can get without actually saying it.

"Even the oldest?" Ah she's got it!

"Even the oldest" I submit. She knows now, I can go, let her get some sleep.

Rising I feel a hand grip my arm, "No don't go, please" she pleads, "Stay, stay with me"

"How could I refuse?" I smirk climbing in beside her, "Just so you know, you can deal with Mickey tomorrow, I'm not dealing with domestics"

"So what do you call this?" she grins at me.

"This" I gesture between us, "is the only bit of domestics I will allow on my TARDIS, do you understand…the ONLY bit!" she laughs before climbing up the bed to rest on my chest.

Something feels so familiar about having Rose lying next to me, having my arms holding her, protecting her…loving her. But what?

**Face of Boe**

"Things are working out perfectly" a hooded man grinned.

"I would say they are developing, but are you sure she's the right one?" the Face of Boe asks.

"There's no denying it" he replies, "You could see all the signs with his ninth regeneration. She is Bad Wolf"

**I hope you liked it…I honestly forgot I was going to continue this fiction, thinking it was only a one shot I left it alone. I remembered though…sorry for those expecting a new chapter faster.**

Fyre-Anjel


	3. Chapter 3

**Rose**

Something has to be done about Mickey; the Doctor can't function around him anymore. He is either snapping at him or ignoring him. Oh no here comes Mickey.

"Rose! Rose I need to talk to you" Mickey caught up to me.

"Yes Mickey?" I stoped waiting.

"The Doctor, he is acting a bit weird lately" Mickey the idiot. Hang on where did that come from?

"Look Mickey he is under a lot of stress, the TARDIS is playing up, she needs more and more repairs, he doesn't think she'll last much longer and you keep pressing buttons!" I snapped, I didn't mean to, it just…happened.

"Why'd I even bother, I knew you'd just take his side" Mickey's always grumbling!

"What do you want me to do Mickey? What am I supposed to say?"

"I don't know, at least support me a little…"

"Support you? Support the person who keeps taking us off track, flicking switches and pressing buttons causing her to groan and shudder? Honestly Mickey grow a brain and use it!" Ouch, that came out worse then I expected. Too late now, just turn and leave.

"Oh that's right, just walk away Rose, you're good at that!" Mickey snaps at me.

"For me to walk away Mickey I actually have to be walking away from something! You want me to support you? Then try supporting me! You've done nothing but resent me for going with him, instead of being there and supporting my decisions. It's all about you Mickey, it always has been. Mickey and his matches, Mickey and his tantrums…well guess what Mickey? I'm tired of it all! I have enough on my plate already, and yet you still feel the need to stand here and once again make me feel like crap because I chose to do something with my life!" I had to breathe, but he had to hear that.

"This isn't something Rose" Mickey began.

"Not to you Mickey, because you don't understand" I walked away at this point, I needed air, and fast.

Reaching the control room I found the Doctor. "Where's the nearest stop with breathable air?" I ask quietly

"Umm…about here" he pressed a button and we stopped. Before saying thanks I just walked out of the TARDIS.

"FRESH AIR!" I cried into the empty horizon. Breathing in deeply I let a few tears drop, the time has come for all dreams to end and the reality to set in. Mickey had to go.

**Doctor**

Something's bothering Rose, she never asks to just stop randomly, I hear Mickey entering from behind me. "What did you do?" I ask bluntly.

"We had a fight"

"About?"

"None of your business" Oh Mickey's getting defensive.

"I'm sorry but 'none of your business' just doesn't cut it Mickey. Rose just has never asked me to land before we've reached our destination. What did you fight about?"

"You, her leaving, her not supporting me…" Mickey listed a few things.

"When are you going to start supporting her Mickey?" I face him, "She has done nothing but worry about you and Jackie, she wonders if you're ok, if you miss her…bloody hell Mickey she misses you and Jackie so much and you still are at her about leaving!" I shake my head at him, "It would be best if you stay inside the TARDIS, I'm going to see if she's ok"

I leave him there, and I lock him in just in case. "Rose?"

"I understand you now, the need for fresh air" Rose replied not facing me, "Sometimes it just hurts too much to be couped up inside her all the time"

"Mickey feels like crap" I offer

"Stop giving him words" she knows me far too well.

"Ok, Mickey looks like crap" I laugh, "I just went off at him too, he's locked inside so you can get some air" I step up beside her.

Rose takes my hand, "I think you need to drop Mickey off Doctor, it's not working" and with that she lets go and walks away.

"What about you? Do you want to go? I know last night was a lot to take in, but now that you've had time…"

"I'm staying" she sounds almost remorseful.

"Is this what you want?" I don't want to hear her answer if she says no. Please be a yes, please!

She looks at me finally; tears are streaming down her face. "I can never have what I want can I?"

"No, no you can't. But that doesn't mean that you have to leave does it?" I ask, damn it's gonna hurt to say goodbye.

"I don't know, last night, today…do you love me?" her question stopped both my hearts.

**Face of Boe**

"He will not tell her, we both know this. The Doctor has seen too much to give in so quickly" the Face of Boe stated.

"Don't be too sure, he has been tackling this for awhile and we need him to say it" the hooded man said.

"Yes I know that but look at him, he is already freezing" the Face of Boe stated.

**Doctor**

I knew she'd ask this one day. "Rose…"

"Don't make up some story about being too old or living longer. I just want to know if you love me" she was determined.

"With both my hearts" I see her release a breath as I pull her into my arms, "So much it scares me half the time, never knowing if we step outside the TARDIS if it'll be your last and I never get to tell you" I pause looking at her, "I need to know Rose, I need to hear you tell me that…"

"I love you Doctor, I've loved you since you showed me the world and saved me from it" she was glowing. If that was possible!

**Rose**

I knew it, I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! My head's spinning at the revelation; all I needed was him to tell me. Looking up at him he seemed so lost. Reaching up I pressed my lips to his before pulling away.

"Be with me" it was a simple request, "Be my Doctor"

"I can't just be yours Rose" there he was back peddling again.

"I don't mean for you to stop helping people Doctor, I just want you to be mine. No more falling in love with French mistresses and such" I stated, hoping he'd stop the back peddling.

"Oh, OH! Then yes, that I can and will do. It's a two way street though Rose and it won't be smooth"

"It never is" I grin kissing him again, "Now lets take Mickey home"

**Face of Boe**

"Stage two complete" the hooded man recorded.

"Stage three; I just hope she survives this" the Face of Boe sighs, "It'll kill him if she doesn't!"

"She will survive!" the hooded figure exclaimed.

"I just hope so for his sake" the Face of Boe watched as the Doctor held close the woman he loves.


	4. Chapter 4

**Doctor**

There's that feeling again, where this feels all right and preordained, but I can't quite place my finger on why. I just told Rose I love her, we are currently setting course away from the Powell Estate, Jackie was pleased to see Rose again, not so please about me, but you get used to it. Rose was right about Mickey not working, he just took up so much time to baby sit, especially around the controls!

"Doctor!" Rose calls from somewhere.

"Yes?" I call back

"You've got a message on the psychic paper" Rose entered with my paper.

"Hmm…last time I got one of these it was the Face of Boe, you remember that, where Cassandra took over our bodies?" I grin at her, knowing she still hates the fact that Cassandra had more guts than she did. "Would you look at that, it is him!"

'_Come to me Lonely God'_ flashed across the paper.

"Well off we go then" Rose nudged me, "He has something important to tell you"

"Should I be worried that you're so excited to see him?" I joke with her as we change course. Something feels off, "Do you feel that?" I ask her.

"Feel what Doctor?" Rose asks before shuddering, "Oh God what's that?" Rose's face scrunches up in pain.

"Rose? Are you alright Rose?" I ask bending towards her.

"What's happening Doctor? Oh…bloody hell it hurts!" Rose swears curling up.

"I don't know I can't see anything wrong!" I can't do anything, "Where does it hurt?"

"Every…where" Rose breathes, "It hurts everywhere"

I watch hopelessly as Rose drops to the ground in pain, there's nothing visibly wrong with her and yet she's in so much pain. The psychic paper falls open out of her hand, new words are flashing across it _'I am sorry Doctor'._ Rose falls unconscious.

**Rose**

The pain is unbearable, the Doctor looks lost and then angry, why is he so angry? Black, everything is black, I try calling for the Doctor but I get no reply.

'_Do not be afraid child'_

"Don't be afraid! Oh that's brilliant, don't be afraid!" I snap hysterical.

'_We mean you no harm, the pain was an unforseen side effect'_

"An unforseen side effect, well the other unforseen problem is the Doctor!" I shout to the blackness, "He will save me from whatever you've done!"

'_You have so much faith in a stranger, why?'_

"The Doctor isn't a stranger" I state, "I've known him for nearly two years!"

'_You know nothing of him child; he shows you the side of him he wishes for you to see, nothing else'_

"You've got to be kidding me, that won't work, nothing can separate us"

'_And what do you think we've just done?'_

"He is still there, I can feel him"

The voice goes silent; I must have said something, hopefully the right thing to take me back to him. I will not let someone do this to us, not after everything that's just happened!

'_You are but a human'_

"Never stopped me before"

'_You have such spirit for a human, yet are you just human? Are you just another human or are you more?'_

"Are you talking to me or yourself?" I ask, this voice is making no sense, now I'm talking about voices in my head!

'_You seem to have a connection with the Time Lord, how is this sustained?'_

"How is what sustained?"

'_This link, this connection you have to him. How is it that a human can feel his presence?'_

"For starters I collapsed inside the TARDIS, he kind of owns the thing and he was there when I fell" Sarcastic, always good to hide fear.

'_No, you misunderstand, you have a link to the Time Lord, a link even his own kind never had'_

"Right ok then, can I go now?"

'_How are you able to create such a link?'_

"I don't know, ask him"

'_Who?'_

"The Doctor of course, his right there" I point towards a faint spot of light, "Oh his not happy"

"Rose?"

"Over here!" I call grinning.

"Rose, what is this place?" The Doctor asks looking around, "And why is it so dark?"

'_How did you get here?' the voice demanded._

"Oh hello, sorry to barge in, names the Doctor. Um…where are we?"

'_Within the human'_

"Hello, I have a name!" Rose snapped

"Yes I know love" the Doctor smiled at me, "Identify yourself!"

'_I already have Lonely God, this is for the human. A test for her'_

"What could you possibly want to test on Rose?" the Doctor asked

'_The legend'_

"I'm the legend, the Oncoming Storm, the Doctor, that's me not her"

'_The other legend, hidden throughout time by the keepers of time and space, hidden even from their own kind'_

"What legend is that?"

'_The legend of the One, the Keeper of Time'_

"That's not a legend; it's a bedtime story given to baby Time Lords!"

"What bedtime story?" I finally ask.

"Ah it basically goes along the lines of there being one who controls time and space to suit itself, the being used it as stepping stones. It was a great story. The hero was a woman, something not common in our bedtime stories, she came from a place far away as they all do, and she followed the sun. In our culture the sun was a symbol for life, love and as you know the vortex, it's bright and golden. Now this is the part every child loved, she wasn't a Time Lord, but it was told that she would give her life willingly to save one. She became the only outsider to be blessed with a long life, or regenerations. Since she was supposedly blessed by a high counsellor of Galifrey, it's unlikely that she will ever be. Especially now that Galifrey is dead" the Doctor explained.

'_Think wanderer, think of your human'_

"That doesn't mean a thing"

'_She gave her life, she sacrificed her life for yours'_

"I did what?" Rose asked

"Nothing Rose, don't listen to him"

'_Why don't you want her to know?'_

'No one should have to live with that knowledge"

'_What do you know of living?' a different voice spat._

"Oh I know a lot more than you old man"

Rose saw something inside the Doctor she'd never seen before; he was so full of anger and hatred.

'_You know nothing of living; you've been in hiding ever since…'_

"Don't you dare! I've been labelled the killer of my people because of you! I've had to live with the last images of my home planet because of you!"

'_Galifrey hadn't been you're home in years, you were so preoccupied with the Earth'_

"I am being punished because of you! I was there; I fought at Arcadia, I WAS THE FRONT LINE!" Rose watched in pain as the Doctor exploded, "WHERE WERE THE REINFORCEMENTS? WHERE WAS THE HELP? I HAD TO WATCH AS THE DALEKS KILLED MY WIFE AND CHILDREN! You have finished with Rose" The Doctor dropped to his knees, "You are not taking her away from me too"

'_I was sent away, I couldn't prevent it. Rose Tyler is the Keeper, you have to let us finish'_

'No, no, no, no, no" the Doctor shuddered, "She's not, she's not, please…you'll kill her if she isn't"

"How do you know I'm the One" I asked confidently enough.

'_You must let us tell her the truth'_

"Tell me, it's not his decision" I stood fast.

"Rose please…"

"Do you love me?"

"Yes" he whispered, "but please don't"

"Then trust me" I looked down at him, "Tell me"

'_You are the Keeper because you gave your life for his, plain and simple. You were sent away, he sent you, you remember that. You got back because you took in the Time Vortex, the whole thing. Together with the TARDIS you flew back, you saved him. You're excuse was that you wanted him safe.' _The Doctor looked at me with tears streaming down his face. _'You destroyed the Daleks, you glowed brilliantly and it nearly destroyed your very being, but he took it out of you, he absorbed the Time Vortex and it destroyed him. He had to regenerate' _I gasped at this point, I couldn't believe I had killed him, tears streaming he continued. _'Rose Tyler, you gave your life willingly for his, you are not one of them, you did something I doubt anyone could have done. To finish this off, the remaining clues you left yourself. The Keeper of Time had another name, she was Bad Wolf'_

I froze; nothing could express what I felt.

**Doctor**

She had to know eventually right? I was being selfish keeping this to myself for so long. I can't believe he has come back to take away what is left of the things that matter to me.

"Are you happy now?" I roared, "She knows, now leave us alone!"

'_Son…'_

"You have no right to that word" I spat, Rose was still frozen, "I will not let you take away what's left of me"

'_You are still a Time Lord'_

"And you are a traitor" I sneered, "You betrayed us all, you promised technology to help and you fled when they arrived"

"Doctor"

"Rose" I spun around she looked at me, no not those eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It wasn't your fault" I replied honestly, "I was going to die either way; you just gave me another option. A better one Rose, you gave me a better option" I pulled her towards me, "I am the one at fault, I should have known that you would've figured something out, you're extremely smart"

'_She needs testing'_

"I said no"

'_Too late, I'm sorry'_

Rose began convulsing in front of me, "No! So many lights, so many words! Oh it hurts so much pain. Gold, brilliant gold…everywhere is gold. So many thoughts, so many memories, oh my, she's beautiful. The storm, it's coming…so dark, so scary, Doctor why!" Rose screamed, "Stop! Stop! Help me, please! Where are they? TAKE ME BACK! No, it's…can't be…" Rose's eyes shot open.

"Rose?"

She crumbled into my arms sobbing, "So much pain, so helpless"

"What did you show her?"

'_You're life'_

"I need you" Rose looked up at me, "Scars and all"

'_She has my blessing, love her son; everyone deserves a second chance at love, live for your people'_

Blinking at the bright lights within the control room of the TARDIS Rose murmurs into my shoulder, "I need you"

"I need you too" I whisper.

**Face of Boe**

"You never told me he was your son" the Face of Boe stated softly.

"He was my son, a long time ago" the hooded man sighed, "I deserve his hatred"

"No one deserves the hatred of a son"

"You don't know what I did" the hooded man whispered, "Because of me he lost everything, his mother, his wife, their children. The only survivor was his grand-daughter and she's dead now too. She chose a life on Earth but returned for the Time War, and she fell along with the others. He was left alone at the battle of Arcadia, all because I left him there"

"What did you do?"

"I left him to fight the war, I needed to finish the weapon, but it wasn't going to be finished in time and I fled, they fought and fought. For years the war went on and for years I hid. I returned at the end, I watched from the distance as he fought alone, then he did the only thing he could do to save the universe. He blew up Galifrey"

"The Lonely God indeed" the Face of Boe muttered, "We shall meet again, this time it will be my death and he will know my great wisdom"

"I'm just glad she survived, I'm being absolutely honest when I say she will be the only human ever to accept his life"

"Stage Three complete"

**I hope you enjoy this chapter, it's taken me all week to get it done because I'm back at university now…updating as often as possible.**

Fyre-Anjel (Pheofy to some)


	5. Chapter 5

**Rose**

The Doctor had shuffled me into the library; then rushed off to make tea. Ah, here he comes now.

"Doctor?"

"Yes Rose?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" I take a sip of my tea.

"It was a long time ago" he sighed.

"The Game station wasn't and you didn't tell me about that either, I mean you mentioned it earlier this week, but I just didn't add it all together"

He put his cup down, "I thought by not telling you, in some strange way, would protect you from it. I didn't want you feeling guilty for me changing; because it wasn't your fault"

"I could've handled it you know"

"Yea, I know, and that was what scared me so much. The fact that you could understand and would probably accept it" He looks so sad for some reason.

Putting my cup of tea down, I cross to the couch he's sitting on. Taking the cup out of his hands and straddling his lap I look down at him. "Fear is driven by the unknown; I understand that you were scared of telling me because you didn't know how I would have reacted. You didn't have to though, and you know that now." With that I swooped down and gave him a gentle kiss.

**Doctor**

Hmm…she is unbelievably amazing. The feel of her lips touching mine was all we needed. Alone in the TARDIS, no danger tracking us down, no possibility for interruptions; I gave in, succumbed to her charms. Reaching around her waist and up to the nape of her neck, I pulled her towards me, maintaining contact with her body. I allowed my lips to travel across her neck and to her collarbone, enticing a moan from her now plump red lips.

"Doctor" she moaned as my hands followed my lips and travelled south. Playing with the hem of her shirt, slowly lifting it, I could feel the goose bumps forming under my touch. Things were heating up, in more than one place.

Wanting to keep it gentle and slow, we moved with precision; shedding the clothing was the easy part, containing ourselves was the harder part.

"Are you sure" I whisper into her ear.

Her response is to pull me up for a kiss before pushing me into the chair, I groaned at the feel of her leaving my skin, even for a moment was torture. Groaning again as realisation hit me, well to be honest, Rose hit me. Sliding slowly onto me we began with slow and gentle thrusts.

I never for the life of me thought our first time would be sitting on a couch in the TARDIS library, but here we were, pumping away at each other. Climbing higher and higher, but never seeming to reach it. There was that drowning feeling again, like we were stuck under a thick layer of ice, hoping for it to break. Rose's moans soon began soft panting, hitching ever so often when I hit the right spot.

I could feel the ice beginning to crack around us; sweat beading off our bodies as we thrust one last time, reaching the surface in agonising pleasure. Rose's body went limp against my chest, her breath short and haggard against my shoulder. Wrapping my shaking arms around her we came down from our high. My lips found hers, kissing her softly as we slipped into a slumber on the couch. My back pressed against the back of the couch, hers to mine and the blanket she swore would come in handy one day draped over us.

Half way through the night Rose stirred. "Rose?"

"Did you turn up the heat?" she asked groggy.

"No, why are you hot?"

"Just a little, but its ok" she snuggled back into my embrace, well at least until she burnt me.

"OW!" I jumped, leaving her on the couch

"What's wrong?" Rose asked looking at me through sleep ridden eyes.

"You're burning, and I do mean literally"

**Rose**

"Don't be silly" I sigh, "Come back to the couch"

"No" I look at him hurt, "Look at my chest"

My gaze drops to his chest, a red mark was appearing, "I did that" I whispered, feeling all the colour drain from my body, I slip into a blackness.

**Doctor**

"Rose?" I asked not daring to touch her, no response. "Bugger it" I take hold of her, she was burning me like a twig within a raging bushfire. I reached the medibay; placing her gently onto a table I begin to assess my burns. "Nanogenes" I muttered. Instantly little golden beads erupted from the roof, showering over me, my burns disappeared as quickly as they came, with less pain.

Rustling through the draws I pull out a syringe, and thermometer. "Ok, just pop it in and wait a few seconds" I'm reading the packaging. Popping the thermometer into Rose's mouth, it beeped. "Unable to give temperature, too high" I sigh slumping onto the stool.

I prep her arm and take some blood; the canister is warmer than usual blood. Taking a few drops I take a squiz at the slides under a microscope. "Well Rose love, nothing is wrong with—hold on a minute, well that makes sense" I release the breath I hadn't realised I'd taken.

Walking back to the table she lay limply on, "You're going to wake up with a massive headache tomorrow dear" Covering her with a blanket I walked back to the library to retrieve a comfier chair. Not wishing another painful night slumped over a medibay table on the god-awful stools. Settling next to Rose, I made sure there were a glass of water and some tablets on an island table next to her head, before dozing off.

"ARGH!" Rose groaned waking up.

"Morning sunshine" I smiled cheerfully.

"What did we do, drink too much?" Rose asked looking at me, swallowing the tablets.

"Hmm…green eyes and freckles…cute" I mumbled.

"Excuse me?" Rose asked

"You now have green eyes and a small sprinkling of freckles, oh and your hair is a little darker. Not too much, just a slight change…lucky. I went from old to just as old" I chuckled to myself.

"Change?" Rose shrieked jumping off the table and reaching the mirror, "Oh I like this colour"

"So do I" I grinned wrapping my arms around her waist, "At least now I won't get burnt"

"Oh that's right, how are you?"

"Nanogenes, fantastic little things" I grinned at her. "Are you ok with this?"

"Sure, I mean it's not like I'm going to suddenly get information about things I shouldn't…wait…nope sorry there it all is" Rose laughed, "Is this what it's like in your head?"

"All the time" I chuckle, "You'll get used to it, I promise" I kiss her gently, "I reckon you're due for a trip home, just to let your mum know that you've change"

"The universe has tipped" Rose giggle, "You're willingly going to see my mum"

"She's not bad when she's not screaming or hitting me" I replied walking out.

Leaving her in the medibay to check out the rest of her changes, I set course for home…I guess you could say it was homeish now.

"Hey Doctor!" Rose called walking into the control room.

"Yes love?" I asked

"I have a birth mark on my right thigh now" She grinned at me, "I've never had a birthmark"

"Not where you could see it anyway" I muttered.

"Oi, I heard that!" the TARDIS landed, "We're here!"

"Rose I wouldn't—"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? DOCTOR? ARE YOU IN THERE?" Jackie screeched from the other side of the door.

Walking out I prepare myself, "Look Jackie before you hit me, this is not my fault…Rose asked to be changed"

Jackie stopped mid-air, "Rose?"

"Yes mum, I'm like him now…don't get angry at him, I chose this" Rose beamed, "Look, natural, beautiful honey blonde" Rose showed off her new hair.

"That's natural?" Jackie asked, the Doctor forgotten, "I wonder if I could get that colour in the bottle"

"I doubt it mum" Rose hugged her, "The Doctor wanted you to see my new look, and I'm going to persuade him to give us a few weeks here to get used to it"

"No, no, no and no" I back peddled pulling Rose with me, "We've seen your mum and now we're going"

"Oh stop it, I'm not going to bite, come on I don't see the two of you enough" Jackie complained walking them inside, "The box will be here in a few weeks"

"I could just move it inside…it's not like Rose sleeps in her room anymore anyway" I caved, I knew I would.

"Alright then, if you two insist on sleeping in that thing, but Rose stays with me" Jackie knew me all too well.

By the time they had reached the flat I'd parked the TARDIS and was making the tea. Jackie seemed content enough just to have us home, me included.

"Oh look at that, he's domesticated" Jackie teased.

"More than that" I grumbled, "Damn ape has me around her little finger these days"

"And so you should be" Jackie agreed. "What's the dish, on you two, these days anyway? Why did my Rose change?"

"Well here's your tea, and you might want to sit down it's a very long story" I handed Jackie her tea and sat. Sighing slightly, the familiar feel of Jackie's couch sagged around me.

"See I told you you're becoming domesticated" Jackie grinned.

"Anyway mum, when the whole going back and saving him thing happened last year, I took in the time vortex and through that I changed myself. He actually had nothing to do with it, because see I'm this famous fairytale in Time Lord bedtime stories. I'm the Bad Wolf you see, only in their customs the Bad Wolf was the good guy, or girl in my defence. I met his dad" Rose pointed at me, "Talked to the Face of Boe, you'll meet him one day, and I got very sick and changed. I didn't mean to get sick it was all part of the blessings. Anyway, through all that I finally got out of him how he feels and as far as I know we're happy and together"

"By together you mean?"

"I'm in-love with your daughter Jackie, yes we've slept together and yes she burnt me…oh hang on was that a question?" I blurted.

"Doctor" Rose hissed.

"Are you going to get married? Well now that you're the same?"

"I don't know" I replied honestly, "I've never thought about marriage, not after my last one"

Jackie went white, "You've been married before?"

"Yep, and I had kids too" I continued.

Jackie looked like she was about to loose it, thankfully Rose is faster at picking up things then I am. "They died mum, right in front of him during the Time War. Don't give him anymore grief then he already carries"

Jackie's features softened, "I'm sorry"

"Don't be, I never planned any of this, not since them" I began, "Then I met Rose, my dear sweet Rose and I couldn't part with her, ever…sending her away last year broke my heart"

"It broke hers too" Jackie sighed, "Here, until you figure out what you're going to do"

Jackie left us in the lounge, Rose curled up into me, "She's taking it better then I expected"

"Yea, maybe she likes me now" I grin stupidly at her.

There was a knock at the door, "I'm coming" Jackie called, "Oh, hello. Yes in the lounge"

Mickey walked into the lounge, "I thought I heard the engines" he grinned at us.

Jackie entered after him, "Here love, see if these fit" I opened my hand and Jackie dropped two rings. One was obviously a female ring, rock and all. The other seemed to be a male ring.

"Thanks Jacks" I tried the ring on my finger, it slipped on perfectly, "What about yours?" I asked Rose, Mickey forgotten.

"It fits!" Rose exclaimed, "Oh mum thank you" Rose hugged Jackie.

Mickey coughed, letting us all know he was still there, "Oh right, hello" I smiled up at him.

"Hi" he grunted, "Rose can we talk please?"

"Um…sure" Rose looked at me, "I'll be back in a minute"

Giving her a smile and let her leave with Mickey the freaking idiot! Jackie looks at me, "What?"

"She loves you, not him"

"I know, but he doesn't. We got rid of him before the whole Rose changing thing, he doesn't even realise she has bloody well changed!" I exclaimed.

"He never was that bright" Jackie stated thoughtfully.

"No kidding" I laughed.

**Rose**

"What did you want to say?" I asked Mickey when we got outside.

"I miss you Rose" he fidgeted.

"Too late Mickey, I'm not going back to you. I thought that was clear when I ask the Doctor to leave you here" I sighed.

"You asked him?"

"Yea…me. Not him"

"Why? We usually just work things out" Mickey exclaimed.

"Not that time, I didn't want to work things out Mickey, I was already in-love with someone else and I didn't want to jeopardise that with you" Rose sighed, "Look there is no chance of 'us' existing again, can't we just be friends?"

"NO!" Mickey bellowed, "No we can not just be friends"

"Too bad, I was going to ask you to come" Rose went to walk inside again.

"Come to what?" He grabbed her arm.

"The wedding" Rose elaborated, "I'm getting married Mickey, but then you'd have noticed that; what with the rings and all, but then you haven't even noticed I've changed. I'm like him now, and we're getting married" Rose smiled happily, "I'm sorry Mickey but I don't have room for you too…unless your ok with being friends, otherwise you should go before he comes out here"

With that being said Rose walked into the flat feeling better with herself then she ever had. With the exception of being with the doctor.

**A/N: Hope you liked it, a bit shorter but it was mainly for the development of Rose's character.**

Enjoy,

Fyre-Anjel


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